11 years ago
Monday, September 15, 2008
I wish I could share all my thoughts with you, but I'm realizing this post area is not big enough. Anyway, I admire you mothers in our family and extended family for all you do! I love tending my grandchildren as I feel their spirits and their energy for life. Please don't let this time pass without helping them renew their promise to Heavenly Father/Mother and the Savior before they left heaven. In this hurried and busy life we seem to all share, we may fail to remember that Coming to the Savior is easier than we think it to be. We need to do it more often each day and with more sincerity. What an example you are to your children. Please share your thoughts/feelings on simplifying your lives so we can better serve the Savior today. Love Ya!
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I'm going to try and put a little thought into this and post again later (hopefully I don't fall asleep while I'm thinking) LOL! Life is waaay too busy for me right now...sigh
I just wanted to quickly point out that you ARE serving the Savior daily when you are raising your little ones. That's the most important thing you can do. I have regrets that maybe I didn't spend enough time with them...although I did read to them and play with them sometimes, etc....and I'm so glad I had the time at home with them when they were little. If that's ALL we accomplished in a day---just being there for the kids...I think you've done a FABULOUS job in serving the Lord.
More later...just a pressing thought that had to get out!
I take it one day at a time. For the past two weeks I've just been really trying to remember to get in some family scripture study and prayers. I guess it can't get more simple than that. I also try to look for teaching opportunities to help them gain a testimony. I know that when they get older I can't be there to protect them from all the evil that exists. I can't make their decisions for them. I can only hopefully teach them how to rely on the Lord, listen to and recognize the Spirit so that when those times come, they will be prepared to meet them. Mom and I talked a lot about that on Sunday while she was with me. As a second counselor in the primary and former primary teacher, I just have a huge testimony of the importance of teaching them young to pray and gain a testimony. I feel an urgency about it - perhaps because I'm in this calling? Even the nursery has gained importance to me. I can see how it's there to help these young toddlers learn about the simplicity of the gospel and prepare them for what is to come. I'm really excited about the new nursery manuel coming out in January!! I don't know that I'm perfect at this or that I always succeed, but I've been impressed with the importance of teaching my children the gospel many times.
AS for me, it has been a lot easier to simplify since we moved out here. I don't have all the distractions I did in Utah. We definetly do more as a family, and it is nice, casue I have Linzy all day, then she is takinga nap when the twins come home, and I get to help them with homework, reading, and chat about their day. Then 45 min later Logan gets home and I do the same with him, and then Linzy wakes up, and we all go outside and play together as a family. IT has been really humbling. I thought I was spending a lot of time with my kids when we were in utah, but now I get more one on one time with them.
We get the chance quite often since we moved out here to discuss Gospel principles with each of the kids. They will come to us and ask questions, since they are the minority here. I take advantage of those teaching opportunities, and am able to help them see new things. We will sit at the dinner table for 30-40 min. casue there are so many things they want to talk about. It is great, and I lvoe seeing how their minds are working and thinking.
I love their sweet spirits and energy. I know they are a CHOICE generation and I want them t ogrow up staying and standing strong in their beliefs.
When Spencer was here in WA and we were in UT, we would call him every night and have family prayer over the phone, casue it was important to the kids that Dad still has family prayer with us. They would look forward to it every night. As we are finally settling in, even if it is only a couple of scriptures every night, we try to still read adn study just a few and explain the simple gospel principles to them.
I don't know if this makes sense. In my head it all does, but you know hoe it is when you try to put it down on paper.
I am so thankful for my beautiful children and all that they continue to teach me everyday. They are my world. I thank th eLord everyday for trusting me enough to allow me this privlege to be their mother.
I have thought about this a lot since you brought it up to me last week Tammy. I hope I can capture some of my thoughts on paper....
One thing I've found is to dismiss some of the expected views of what a perfect mom is. One main one is cooking. My kids and Cory aren't big eaters - Cory would much rather I just let him have a big bowl of cereal for dinner. Anyway, instead of putting way too much time into fancy homemade meals every night - I really have scaled back - BIG TIME with our meals. The kids haven't complained, Cory's been grateful I don't make a big deal out of eating all the time, and I've had a little more time to spend with the kids when I could have been slaving over the hot stove. I also haven't been baking nearly like I used to. Now this has been a good thing for all of us - because I seemed to be the one who ate most of the baked goods (not good for my resolve to loose weight) and it took time away from my kids. So I don't bake many goodies anymore. Sure - we'll do cookies from time to time - but lots of sweets just aren't being cooked at our house.
I also let Gabe help me cook sometimes - stiring things, getting things out of the cupboard for me. It doesn't necessarily simplify the process - but then at least I'm multi tasking - I'm getting dinner ready AND spending time teaching him.
I try to multi task in other ways too. Instead if sitting down and officially having a lesson about directions (right and left), or colors - I talk about it when we're driving. We talk about which way we're turning, and what color the cars or traffic lights are. I try to make each moment I have with them into some kind of a teaching moment. It's not always successful - but I do know they pick up on these things even faster than if I was to sit down and have a school moment and teach them that way. They learn how these concepts work in their lives.
One thing I've been doing the last several weeks/months is when I am feeling crazed and like I don't know how I'll get everything done (which is likely when I'm putting my kids off about fun things and telling them "maybe later") I try to step back for a second and think of something that my kids would enjoy doing. Frequently it's a quick trip to the park, a little walk together, a ranger ride, or getting a treat somewhere. But I try to take a break and remember that they will only be small for a VERY short time. Sure - my to-do list is still there when I get back - but it appears more managable, I feel like I have my kids support because I've taken time for them - and I feel less like a crazed mom.
I've beent thinking a lot lately about how the time we have with our children IS service. Every moment we have with them we are serving and teaching them. Every diaper we change, every mess of toys we pick up, every meal we make, every story we read - they are all ways we are serving our Heavenly Father. We are taking care of His most precious children - and THAT is service! I wish that the church would teach this concept more readily - so that as LDS women we could quit beating ourselves up because at this stage in our lives we aren't out and about serving as much as we might be capable of doing when our kids are out of the home. Yes, serving other outside of our home is also essential - but if we look at each thing we do as young mothers as service I believe we'd be more encouraged, more hopeful, and want to serve our children with all the energy of our hearts.
Thanks for helping me think of this Tammy - I'm going to work on simplifying even more and look forward to what others say.
Joanna
I am probably too late for this to help for your lesson, but oh well. These are just my thoughts, I hope they don’t come across as judgmental or offensive, just my view on things. I’m typing one handed as I nurse Genevieve, so sorry about the choppiness.
There was a talk give by Elder Hales where he gave simple things we need to do/say to ourselves to make our lives better/easier. These are things I try to do in our marriage and home.
I try to tell myself “I can’t afford that”. Being a poor college student/newlywed/new parent I find this one easy at times. How simple life becomes when you aren’t spending money left and right. Sorry, but I’m not going to elaborate further.
The next is “I don’t have time for that”. This is a little harder for me because so many times there are so many good things to choose from that take up your time. I try to focus my time on things that strengthen my family, my relationship with the Lord, as well as things that make me a better person/wife/mother (and if taking a 20 minute nap, reading a book, or exercising makes me feel more rested or better about myself, I am going to be a better wife and mother). It is so hard to prioritize and balance your time. I try to involve the Lord and go to Him in prayer to help me know what needs to come first. Once I know the things that are worth spending time on, I can’t feel guilty about those choices, about not spending time doing certain things – for me worrying and feeling guilty really wastes time and energy.
Being flexible has also helped me simplify my life. I try to go with the flow and if things go other than planned, I’m not as stressed.
We got rid of TV a couple of years ago (we still have a TV and we watch movies) and that has really simplified our lives and has made things better for us.
Love you all and thanks for your insights
I'm still thinking about this question Tammy. After we talked the other day at the wedding I started to really think some more about it. I haven't really come up with anything yet. I guess that means that my life is far from simplified. I promise I will get back to you on this.
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